Twisted Fate in Competition

I have had this kind of goal to acheive or reach before 25, which I will be in 2 years.
One of them is to win a competition, it doesn't matter even if its consolation, if consolation exist.

Maybe I haven't learnt the true meaning of competition or I have been too half hearted about it.
I'm good but I'm never good enough. Especially in certain entries I'm really proud with or have confident in.

So far, competitions I joined gets me to the First round but filtered out easily in Final round.

1. Adobe Design ( for students )
2. Piala Seri Endon
3. Malaysia Footwear Design Competition.


So, I would like to blame the first one on the printing. Therefore fails the final round. Or that the idea doesn't link very well unless malaysian, or so i thought.

And for the second one which sucked my savings dry for trying it. I dont blame it. I think I did well, just that I made myself think that its not my forte that I didn't win anything.

For the last one....I personally think that I did everything I could, presented it well ( although someone did bring their laptop with them showing the judge pictures of the process -well, who is one of the winner in my category ). So of course he would have an upper hand doing so which I don't think that should be why my entry should be eliminated. Another burns money into the shoes...figuratively speaking. So, I lose on idea or money? I dont know. Cant figure it out. I know that sometimes, it doesn't mean effort must pay.

Disappointment. It hits me hard in the head. It shatters my pride, my one year long experience in the industry. Not to mean anything bad, but didn't this position makes me no different that other amateurs? I feel sick thinking about it. Its as if I failed the subject I studied extra hard in my SPM.


Or perhaps, its to give me a lesson, to make me realise things don't always, or rather, never really go your way. Or to train me to not give up after this fall. Or if I win, it might destroy me. I might get too arrogant. I don't know. But I'm trying to figure out

Some say looks like spices jar for deco

Competition shoes. The picture is so artsy fartsy...lol
But very well taken, considering the bad lighting in the room.
Picture courtesy Mr. Choo.
Result is not out yet though...

Went to bowling yesterday with Ashlei and her friends. I'm like having bowling crash course with 4 games in a row. Thank you Ashlei for inviting...

Next time I'll bring you go paintball, k? haha

Adorablility

I'll admit I dont even know if the word for the title existed.

But its good enough to describe this!


























not mine though...


*squeals*

Left of Right

Nowadays, it has always been once in a blue moon post.

And posts without pictures.

Oh...there you go, new facebook profile pic.
























There have been lots going on in 2010 despite having it just passed 2 months.

Well, I've been to paintball during CNY and got myself some bruises....

I am now a fangirl!!! ( though I think I'm too old for that...but nevermind )

There's this primary schoolers gathering ( which i didnt attend since i'm sick )

Went to HK for the 2nd time and smelled and tasted what it feels like to have winter as a season.

Got my first ever bonus!

Got myself a lot of freelances.

Getting used to being busy.

Going for lesser movies. This year so far only 3 movies, ok? (when I used to watch at least 1 a week )




I have been trying to lay out future plans.
So far the plan is...

Since the earth is going to be destroyed real soon....
going to see the world is important. Haha...


Plan to have some achievements...
But who decides whats achievements and whats not

Buck up real hard, set some expectation for oneself, win a competition or something like that.
Have some really serious planning, pack up and go overseas to secure a job with some good reputation in the industry.

or

If let say you manage to drink 5 litre of waters a day, thats considered an achievement, no?
Or finish a new drama in a weekend.


Sigh, my thoughts are at war.

I want, I dont.
Contemplating on what should i go after.
Achievements? or be happy?
Or be happy to have achievements?
Or to achieve happiness?

This 2 years, it seems like it is not going anywhere.
I might have crawled a little...though...

When i thought i need to do something productive in the weekends,
immediately the motivation died down...as soon as i thought of doing it.

Thing is I lack patience...to do anything that is.

And to think that everything is interesting and worth a try.

Like I dont want to become a designer anymore. I want to pick up new language and become a translator. Or learn make up and become a make up artist. Maybe I could join a singing audition. Perhaps I like something else better....like a nanny or something. Oh....I should've tried to become news broadcaster.

To be frank, I'm greedy. I dont get why one should stick to doing something for more than half their lifetime to live. When most of the time people dont like what they are doing.


Ok.


If any of you were to choose something you like doing and something you are good at doing, what would you choose?

Chinese New Year

As one year passed after one, Chinese New Year has not been very exciting anymore...
This year is going to be a good year i suppose.
It kinda started well.


I been a long time since my last post. Probably because of the freelance SOS that I sent out so I have been quite busy earning money.


Last minute shopping as usual, and finally got something that's not black, to wear on the first day of Chinese New Year. Shopped for my mom and sis as well...I am missing a pair of flats.


A lot going on, a lot to do...

change bed sheet, mop the floor, clean the fan, wash the yard, vacuum the car, tidy my room, cook reunion dinner.....

Dont think its possible for me to finish it before night time.

Happy Valentines for all the love birds...
too bad first day of CNY falls on Valentines...
Hahaha....


I will make more time to blog...
Thats my CNY resolution

Freelance

I need to start freelancing.
Both graphic and shoes design are fine.

Anyone?

Counting missing toes

Its been quite a long year in debts.
Travelling, investing in competitions and some silly unexpected money wasting method i used. Well, accidentally.

To sum it up, its not a very good year but still pulled through it.


But its quite a nice way to end it watching the best movie in 2009.

As of today, I wouldn't want to be in a sardin kind of situation to watch some fireworks.
Call me an old lady...i dont mind. I do act like one.


I would prefer to knit (although i dont know how) watching soap operas.
Call me boring...i dont mind. I'm one hell of a bored person.


Today is the last day of the year. Last Thursday of the year....
A few hours away from year 2010.


Nothing to anticipate anymore...I should spend more time finding anticipations.
Besides catching up every movies i missed when i'm in debts.
Catching up with friends, maybe?

Maybe I could stare at my bellybutton for a long long time.
Or should i try to learn some new tricks to impress my dog.

Hair needs some shaping.

I feel like I have been looking into the same person every morning for too long a time.
I started to feel nauseaus.

And i have a dog here licking my screen...cool huh...

MFDC SemiFinal

Its been a slowdown in posting and to keep the blog somehow...alive.
Life hasn't been very interesting for me though. However,

The result for Malaysian Footwear Design Competition semifinal is out today.

There's a total of 12 entries from 5 people from my company who entered.

May (shoes + graphic designer) = 3 ladies fashion entries.
2 ladies evening entries.
1 ladies casual entry.

Jen (senior shoe designer) = 1 ladies fashion entry.
2 ladies evening entries.

Jo (fashion designer) = 1 ladies evening entry.

JoonMing (graphic designer) = 1 men fashion entry.

Saiful (accessories designer) = 1 ladies fashion entries.


Entries highlighted in red failed to make it to the semifinals.

However, entries highlighted in green are all IN.

5 of us managed to get to the semi and will need to prepare for sourcing and prototyping the shoes drawn.

Root for us!


Check out my shoes entries drawing here!

Its cold these days

It has been a long long while since i've last blogged. Busy with batik competition that has already over by now. Busy with trying to make more money with beading dresses from my company.

All in all, I have slowly transformed to a bitter, homely spinster. Lol.
Due to some financial difficulties, I have been staying away from malls, and weekends hangout with friends activities.
Although, I'm still a regular cinema patron. Where, most of the time alone i guess.
Think that I have pick up this habit to watch movies whenever and wherever i feel like it.


I'm blogging from my office, this time of the month, I'm a little free. Trying to search for some part time job.
Waiting for time to pass. Waiting for weekends to come. Waiting for...

*skip*


Lets talk about the weather.
It rained endlessly these days. Its all cosy and sleepy. It certainly doesnt help raining in the morning where I have to get up and go to work.

Oh, I almost forgot.

Initially, this post is to talk about Melbourne.
I'm flying to Melbourne in June.

HK first in January.


Turning 23 soon. Reminds me of how fast time flies.

Dangerous stunts

Kids at home, please do not try to follow the actions.

I have fall (literally) countless of times being a human.
I have always been.
From the bus,
slippery floor,
clean and even roads,
from games,
and today....

i feel from the stairs...to be precise, its diving down the stairs.
strangely it hurts but i dont really feel it.

I could say I'm lucky i'm wearing pants instead of short skirt, or else I'll be so embarrassed I dont think I'll work there anymore.

In a daze today

Around the world

Well, this idea has been at the back of my head for several years now. Its what I've (well, most ppl) always wanted to do before I'm 30. Somehow it feels like my spontaneous nature will bring me to pack my luggage, hop on a train and I'm gone. How I wish it could be that simple. Drop your job, pack your bags, leave a note to your parents and oh! i'm already at another side of the world.

Well, for what I think, I'll definitely need to make it happen. As I almost forgot that I'll be 23 next year. Thing is, I dont really have a plan. Yet. I'll make one. I'll do researches and I'll fund it. I'm just afraid that by then, I lost the fire. I hope I'll manage till then.

Stepping foot in foreign land, work wherever and whatever to fund my travel. This will definitely be my goal for the next 12 months.

who's with me?

MacQueen's Absurdity

More brain shocking picture at drizzles

Wax and Burns

Go to Drizzles for more!

Fly me to the moon

Its mid autumn festival today.
Not sure if its something worth celebrating.
Well, at least I think its best if its being celebrated.
For I think if it can be omit, i will be the same for coming years.
Are we losing the essence of being a chinese?
Or is it not really that important of a festival.
Even neighbours kid dont play candles or lanterns anymore.
Maybe they are all grown up, just like me now.
As Malaysian, we tend to have too many to celebrate.
So, it doesn't really matter though, to miss some...
Right?


What will matter from now on? And what doesn't?

Goddess

Prologue

Clocks ticking.
Times running.
Pocket draining.
Back aching.
Sleep depriving.
Soul depleting.
Mind wandering.
Ideas hiding.
Fat increasing.
Batik completing.
Shoes drafting.
Heart crying.
Accomplished nothing.
While writing.
Clocks ticking.
Times flying.
Moon shining.
Result waiting.
Clothes soaking.
Breeze tickling.
Dream pending.
Friends leaving.
Age catching.
Blogging.

Back from Siam

I have had a tremendous vacation with my colleagues in Pattaya and Bangkok.

First ride a jet ski
First almost drown after thrown down the sea by the banana boat
First elephant show
First tranny show
First thai cultural show
First cruise dinner
First lost in chatuchak
First spa
First thai massage

This is one of my longest time away from home, most pocket drenching trip i have ever been.
But its all worth the experience.

Next stop will be melbourne.

Accomplishment

I spent the whole month of August finding ways to earn extra bucks for me to go for a holiday.
Well, my target at first was a bit off....where I tried to earn one k and everyone else thinks i'm a nonsense. Okay, i admit. That was nonsense. There's not really a legal way to earn 1 k in a month having a full time job. If you know of one....i'll hate you for not telling me earlier


It all happened when I decided I'll go to a 6 days trip to bangkok with my colleague and all...
It was end of july then. I had 5 weeks to make it possible.


Some offered to lend money to me, some even say to sponsor me.

Some say to buy lottery...(which i did but did not win )

Some say to sell body.....lol


Of course, as a designer, the most natural thing that comes in mind is freelancing.
But, one thing with freelancing is that you dont really get the money on time.


I sell soya bean. Every 3 days in a week. I go around my office to get people to order soya bean, and deliver it the next day. It kinda worked I dont know why, 80 % of people like to drink soya in my office. I just need to wake up 3 hours earlier in the morning.


I sell soya beans, black soya beans and even soya beancurd.

So far, black soya beans sells best because of its nutrient values that somehow every auntie in my office knows of.

I feel accomplished. Its really great to live life. Well, at least I can prove that I can do it if I am serious about it.

Cant wait to embrace the beach in Pattaya!

Goal Calendar

After having been trained in The One Academy for 3 years, I realised that I cant really survive without a deadline. And without a target, a bull's eye.

I have been working for a year and realised that I didnt achieve anything thus far. Not portfolio, not winning any competition, no freelance whatsoever. Everyday is just routine, doing the almost same thing month for month by now.

Thats why I thought of setting some goals for myself, short term ones of what to achieve in 2 years. That will be 104 weeks, 730 days. Quite plenty if I really made use of it.


Some people works 20 hours a day. I certainly cant do that anymore. I'm old for goodness sake.
watched UP the other day and realised that really, the adventure is out there. Nothing's gonna happen for real if i keep staying in the same circle, shying away from what is...out there.


I have always had this thought, that is to be able to work overseas. But if I never had a timeline for it, it will never happen.

So, I thought of this GOAL CALENDAR. I worked well with deadline, in fact, cant really work without it. I worked better with things that has some limitation thats why.

What this goal calendar does is to set a goal in a timeline and to be able to accomplish it.
Treat it like a final assesment...and will be graded, so I wont be so half assed about it.

I plan to design it, that is to suit everyone that feels like they need to accomplish something in life...

I do have the rough idea on it though...

1) GOAL
2) DEADLINE
3) ACTIONS
4) OUTCOME
5) ANALISATION


Key things like SWOT analysis. But its a very very initial stage, I hope I could give it more of a thought, figure it out exactly what it takes and needs to accomplish a task.
The loopholes, the design of it in every page and the format of it...whether or not it should be in a book, or it works better with a big ass manilla card, or small notebooks, stick ons, and so on.


It feels like an idea, i need people help me expand it...well, for those who dont think that its stupid.

It would be great if it could be improvised, making it easier and effective achieving something shortterm. At the very least, it makes me feel like i really live everyday doing something.

So, any ideas?

We're IN

We are IN! Into semifinals for Piala Seri Endon!

Proud to say that all entries from my office colleagues are EEN!